Green Eggs and Soy
by Merc-for-Hire
Summary: Ranma/Green Eggs and Ham fusion. That's right. Ranma with a Seuss book. What the heck was I thinking??? I really have no clue... O_o;;;


Ryuu Inverse had asked once, "How about a Ranma fusion with Green Eggs and   
Ham? Have Akane replace Sam-I-Am and have her chase down Ranma to make him   
eat the breakfast she made for him."  
  
This is a Ranma 1/2 and Green Eggs and Ham fusion. Neither belong to me and   
yet the fused product does. And I wonder if this a good thing be...  
  
I blame Ryuu and boredom for this thing. O_o;;;  
  
If you want to C&C, my e-mail is: mercforhire@ranmamail.com  
  
Green Eggs and Soy  
-------------------  
  
Through the sky a pigtailed boy flew, not freely, not happily, nor of his   
own free will. Yet flew he did, in pain he did so sail, the welt of that   
dreaded mallet present stayed. A mallet truly a dreaded weapon was.  
  
Akane: I am Akane, jerk!  
Uncute tomboy am I?  
  
She so yelled as disappear did that pervert do, in the air a dot he   
already be. Not yet morning and insults had already been unleashed. A   
hateful act they played, she so knew, but yet they so kept doing, neither   
quite happy with this act. Well she would show him, yes she would! A   
masterpiece she would make, so tasty, he would love it, yes he would. And   
he'd call her by her name alone, not those nasty insults would she ever   
hear again.  
  
Ranma: That Akane!  
That tomboy!  
I do not like  
that fiancee of mine!  
  
Our hero so had said, as he raised himself from the water in which he'd   
fallen, for water it would always be. No sooner had he come back, a tomboy   
he did face. Not something he did wish, but nor was it, something he could   
quite control.  
  
Akane: Do you like green eggs and soy?  
  
Smiling cutely she so asked. Green eggs and soy? Ranma no other action   
knew, so blanch he did. Now -that- he'd never eat. Smiling cutely she may   
be, but trapping him she would not. Her smile quite cute may be, to her   
cooking no match would it be. Not even in name, quite his appetite did   
this dish reach. Combined with her skill, no way, no how, that meal he'd   
ever taste.  
  
Ranma: I do not like them, tomboy.  
I do not like green eggs and soy.  
  
He quickly answered, as he moved quickly, trying to escape.  
  
Akane: Would you like them here or there?  
  
She said oblivious, pointing to the dojo and by the koi pond. Eat her   
meal, Ranma would. Oh yes, her masterpiece he would eat.  
  
Ranma: I would not like them here or there.  
I would not like them anywhere.  
I do not like green eggs and soy.  
I do not like them, you tomboy.   
  
He sweated, running past her and into the house. Kasumi's cooking he would   
eat, safer would it be.  
  
Akane: Would you like them in the house?  
Would you like them with a douse?   
  
She said as she saw him going into the house. She knew he'd eat it, or a   
douse regardless he would get.  
  
Ranma: I do not like them in the house.  
I do not like them with a douse.  
I do not like them here or there.  
I do not like them anywhere.  
I do not like green eggs and soy.  
I do not like them, you tomboy.  
  
Shout he did as he noticed no breakfast on the table lay. The panda, yes,   
the panda die it would. No choice left, he did the thing left to do, to   
school he'd go and Ucchan's food he'd eat. No way, no how, Akane's green   
eggs and soy would he eat.  
  
Akane: Would you eat them in the school?  
Would you eat them by the pool?   
  
She said hopefully as walk to school they did. Yes the pool a nice place   
to eat by be and Ranma, her food would he praise. And if he did not eat,   
push him in the pool she'd do.  
  
Ranma: Not in the school.  
Not by the pool.  
Not in the house.  
Not with a douse.  
I would not eat them here or there.  
I would not eat them anywhere.  
I would not eat green eggs and soy.  
I do not like them, you tomboy.  
  
He replied, shaking his head he did. Ucchan he could see, but food nearby   
he did not see. Sighing he did, no choice, no chance, to the Nekohanten he   
would head. So school he left, class be damned. Food he did so need and   
Amazons would so bring. No way, no how, Akane's green eggs and soy would   
he eat.  
  
Akane: Would you? Could you?  
In the street?   
Eat them! Eat them!  
Here they are.  
  
She cheerfully said, bringing out the dish she'd hidden behind her back.   
Here in the street, her Ranma would so dine. Yes, he'd eat, he'd smile and   
whisper how good it had been he'd do.   
  
Neither noticed Ukyo following them, her Ranchan's safety in her mind.  
  
Ranma: I would not, could not, in the street.  
  
He frowned as he dodged the water from the pail of that old lady. He   
stared at the dish Akane carried. Green eggs and soy indeed it was, but   
still no way, no how, Akane's green eggs and soy would he eat.   
  
Akane: You may like them.  
You will see.  
You may like them in a tree!  
  
She added as Ranma jumped up a tree, a cat he so did try escape. It seemed   
the Nekohanten a plumbing problem did quite have and a cat had Shampoo so   
become.  
  
Ranma: I would not, could not in a tree.  
Not in the street! You let me be.  
I do not like them in the school.  
I do not like them by the pool.  
I do not like them in the house.  
I do not like them with a douse.  
I do not like them here or there.  
I do not like them anywhere.  
I do not like green eggs and soy.  
I do not like them, you tomboy.  
  
He said hurriedly as he continued to move, jumping out of the tree while   
he was at it, and to the mountains he did run. If he could not eat, then   
at least train he could. No way, no how, Akane's green eggs and soy would   
he eat.   
  
As Akane followed, neither once again noticed Ukyo and now Shampoo, human   
yet again, following them as well.  
  
Akane: To train! To train!  
To train! To train!  
Could you, would you, while you train?  
  
She shouted with glee as a kata he began. And stop too did he, training no   
way he'd get, Akane's food a close by danger.  
  
Ranma: Not when I train! Not in a tree!  
Not in the street! Akane! Let me be!  
I would not, could not, in the school.  
I could not, would not, by the pool.  
I will not eat them with a douse.  
I will not eat them in a house.  
I will not eat them here or there.  
I will not eat them anywhere.  
I do not eat green eggs and soy.  
I do not like them, you tomboy.  
  
He groaned out, running from the mountains as he said so. That cave! Yes   
in that cave, hide he could. No way, no how, Akane's green eggs and soy   
would he eat.  
  
Akane: Say!  
In the dark? Here in the dark!  
Would you, could you, in the dark?  
  
She added, a flashlight on the one hand, the dish on the other. Eat in   
here he would, and celebrate in this dark place together, yes they would.   
And blush she did, for a pervert she was not. No way, no how, a pervert   
would she be.  
  
Ranma: I would not, could not, in the dark.  
  
He said with a finality, a nervous tone present, for Akane's blush had   
been seen. Out he'd go and escape.  
  
Akane: Would you, could you, in the rain?  
  
She asked, lines of worry in her face. For rain it did indeed and a mood   
it did displease. Could it be? Could he not a feast desire?  
  
Ranma: I would not, could not, in the rain.  
Not in the dark. Not while I train.  
Not in the street. Not in a tree.  
I do not like them, Akane, you see.  
Not in a house. Not in school.  
Not with a douse. Not by a pool.  
I will not eat them here or there.  
I do not like them anywhere!  
  
He, now she, said as into the clinic he did enter. Hot water he did need   
and hot water he would get. No food was it, but no way, no how, would   
Akane's green eggs and soy he would eat.  
  
Akane: You do not like green eggs and soy?  
  
She asked, a small tear forming in her eye.  
  
Ranma: I do not like them, you tomboy.  
  
He responded, though a flinch he made as the tear he did notice even as he   
turned male with hot water.  
  
Akane: Could you, would you, while they gloat?   
  
She snapped at him as she pointed at the other fiancees, Kodachi, Ukyo and   
Shampoo who for sometime had been so following. How Kodachi had arrived   
none did know, yet the fact remained, the fiancees all here were.  
  
Ranma: I would not, could not, even if they gloat!  
  
He said, though glaring at the others, as if daring them to gloat. And   
flinch too they did, for their Ranma no way, no how, would they anger.  
  
Akane: Would you, could you, on a boat?  
  
Out of nowhere she did ask. Quite nervous and desperate she so was. Could   
it be? Could a feast he not desire?  
  
Ranma: I could not, would not, on a boat.  
I will not, will not, so let them gloat. points at fiancees  
I will not eat them in the rain.  
I will not eat them while I train.  
Not in the dark! Not in a tree!  
Not in the street! You let me be!  
I do not like them in the school.  
I do not like them by the pool.  
I will not eat them in a house.  
I do not like them with a douse.  
I do not like them here or there.  
I do not like them ANYWHERE!  
I do not like green eggs and soy!  
I do not like them, you tomboy.  
  
He stated with a finality he had never used. Hurt her he did not wish, but   
no way, no how, Akane's green eggs and soy would he eat.  
  
Akane: You do not like them.  
So you say.  
Try them! Try them!  
And you may.  
Try them and you may, I say.  
  
She said, a fierce glare now present. As a red aura sprang, oh yes it did,   
a mallet in her free hand did so form. And wait she did, for Ranma's   
response.  
  
Ranma: AKane!  
If you will let me be, I will try them.  
You will see.  
  
He sighed as this he said. And so, as a tear of joy leaked out, Ranma a   
bite of the green eggs and soy he did take.   
  
Ranma: Say!  
I like green eggs and soy!  
I do! I like them, you tomboy!  
And I would eat them in a boat.  
And I would eat them before they gloat... points at fiancees  
And I will eat them in the rain.  
And in the dark. And while I train.  
And in the street. And in a tree.  
They are so good, so good, you see!  
So I will eat them in the school.  
And I will eat them by the pool.  
And I will eat them in the house.  
And I will eat them with a douse.  
And I will eat them here and there.  
Say! I will eat them ANYWHERE!  
  
He smiled as he said this, the other fiancees shouting their disapproval   
forgotten, for only Akane's smile did matter.  
  
Ranma: I do so like green eggs and soy!  
Thank you! Thank you, you tomboy!  
  
He added and beam she did. He did! He did, her feast enjoy! Oh joy, oh   
joy!  
  
And then faint he did.  
  
Akane: RANMA NO BAKA!!!  
  
-FIN- 


End file.
